Cape Sauce (careful it’s drippy)

October 21, 2008 · Filed Under MLB · 2 Comments 

Editor’s note: Today we have another post from the great Tiny Danza

by Tiny Danza… While an entire nation mourns a season interrupted and The Goat wakes-up in a sea of Natural light cans, let us take a moment for some acknowledgement with some local flavor.   No, not the winner of the Teaticket 500 but YOUR 2008 Cape league/MLB ALL-STARS.

Yes Tiny Danza has taken the privilege of assembling this year’s squad complete with yearend stats, line-up, rotation, bullpen, bench, and one illustrious post-season award.  Although only one of the fellows on this year’s squad are actually “locals” (Pena is from Haverhill via Dominica)  they have all crossed the bridge, sipped on chowdah, swam at our beaches, played on our fields, drank at our bars and perhaps even served you ice-cream, sold you butts, aided in your (my) quest for crab ointment, bagged your groceries, and/or your girlfriend.

If you’re not aware, you best recognize the best amateur baseball league on the planet right in your backyahd. This writers memories go back to the days of the Sid Bream, and Sam Natille who although didn’t quite get to Boston made a lasting impression with his prodigious blasts which routinely approached the goal posts on the Sheraton side of Fuller/Arney Allen Field.  16 of this rosters 24 players were represented in this post season while 4 will play in the World Series.

EVEN the television booth is represented in the person of Ron Darling.  Who won the MVP of the ‘80 Cape League All-Star game played at Yankee Stadium by only hitting a single, double and a homer while also coming in from left field to close out a 10-9 game.  For those of you who don’t subscribe to the baseball prospectus and/or read Bill James regularly OPS is simply a combination of Slg. % and On-base percentage and has become a highly utilized barometer of offensive merit.  All other stats and ramblings should be self explanatory if not entertaining.

So sit down and enjoy a team with numerous MVP candidates, A Cy-Young Lock, a plethora of All-Stars, two Jews, a Jamaican, a Man-Crush, Douche’ Sauce, Porn Star, Tattoo, Dance Fever  and “Nights in Rodanthe” references, potential bus drivers, AND paperboys.   And do yourself a favor next summer and check out as many Cape league games as possible, you’ll thank me later.

2008 CAPE LEAGUE /MLB ALL-STARS:      Line-up

1. K. Youkilis: 1B BoSox/Bourne ‘00    Avg. .312 –  OPS .959   HR 29  –   RBI 115

Even the most ardent of Chowdah’ heads didn’t expect THIS kind of production from Yooooouk, a viable MVP candidate.  Despite being advertised as the “Greek God of Walks”, Youk is actually the “Jewish King of Beantown”.

2. L. Berkman: O.F. Astros/Wareham ‘96   Avg. .312 - OPS .987- HR  29 - RBI  106 - R 114

Carried this team for much of the year and will receive MVP votes while his team’s struggle to finish reminded many of a poor Peter North performance.

3. R. Braun: O.F.  Brew Crew/ Brewster ‘04   Avg.  .285- OPS .888 — HR 37 - RBI 106 —

Was an MVP candidate throughout most of the season despite missing time to injury while more importantly before he’s all done will approach Greenberg and Kofax for best Jewish ballers of all time?     Oy Vey!

4. M. Teixiera D.H. Rangers-Angels/ Orleans ‘99  AVG. .308 - OPS .962 - HR 33 - RBI  121

Emerging superstar whose gold glove caliber D takes a backseat to Youk’s Gold Glove and will represent as the D.H..  Due for a huge payday as this off-seasons biggest catch while he’s dispelled rumors he was born/raised in E. Falmouth and once drove bus #44.

5. C. Utley  2nd Phil’s/Brewster’98-Cotuit’99   AVG. 292 - OPS .915 - HR 33 - RBI 104 - R  113

One of many MVP candidates but the only one who delivers the Cape Cod Times in the off-season.    Monster power, cuddly face.

6. E. Longoria 3rd Rays/ Chatham ‘05  AVG. 272 - OPS .874 - HR 27 - RBI 85

Young (23), emerging superstar just edges out Nation man-crush Mike Lowell. He put up these numbers despite not making the team out of spring training and missing time (1 month) with a broken wrist.   Nation found out about this young man’s power, poise and glove the hard way.

7. J. Bay O.F. Pirates-Sox/ Chatham ‘99   AVG. 286. - OPS .895 - HR 31 - RBI 101 - R  111

Put up very good numbers in the first half despite being protected in the Pirates lineup by Doug Mientkiewicz!  Yeah THAT Mientkiewicz!!  (Which is Polish for “douche sauce” by the way).  JBay showed he belongs with play-off breakout with Bosox.

8. K. Shoppach C  Indians/Harwich ‘00   AVG .261 - HR. 21 - RBI 55

Despite so-so numbers ex-Sox farm hand relegates our Capt. to a cameo role fitting for Alfred Hitchock, while Tek possessed numbers twice as spooky.

9. R. Theriot  S.S  Chi Cubs/Wareham ‘00   Avg. .307 — .387 OBP — 22 steals

Although not a household name Ryan has had “Dance Fever”, yes it’s pronounced Terrio, around the bases for the Cubbies’ all season.

Bench: Ellsbury O.F.   50 steals                                            Roberts 2nd .296     40 steals

Burrell O.F.      33 HR                                                 V-Tek C          Capt.

Pena 1B           31 HR - 101 RBI                               Lowell 3rd Man Sauce

PITCHERS:

S.P.1    T. Lincecum  Giants/ Harwich ‘05 Look at his numbers and then his team (second fewest runs in the National league) and then say the 2008 National League Cy Young award goes to…                                                    18-5     ERA 2.62       K/BB/IN    265/84/227

S.P.2   B. Sheets Brewers/Wareham ‘98-Orleans ‘99 Every year the MLB ALL-Star game was played in New York city the starting pitcher for the National league also started Game 1 of the World series. Well that’s until Ben Sheets and this year’s Crew of course.    13-9       ERA 3.09           K/BB/IN    158/47/198

S.P. 3    J. Saunders Angels/ Harwich ‘01 Came out of now where to take over Weaver’s expected role, help the Angles produce the best record in baseball, and subsequently dismissed like a child in the first round.             17-7                     ERA 3.41           K/BB/INN   103/53/198

S.P. 4    S. Marcum Jays/Harwich ‘02 Promising young starter who posted decent numbers despite being plagued with injuries much of the season and pitching for an offense with as punch as Glass Joe.                                   9-7              ERA 3.39           K/BB/IN      123/50/151

PEN

R.P. 1    B. Morrow Mariners/Y.D. ‘04-05 Filled in nicely while  J.J. “watch your Mouth” Putz was down and is a burgeoning star as a starter.   ERA - 3.34              K/IN - 75/64                        S V- 10

R.P. 2   J.  Masterson  Sox/ Wareham ‘05 Tito’s confidence in Big J. superseded that of M.D.C as the season progressed while  one of the biggest off-season questions for Theo and the boys will be his role entering the spring.  Not great numbers but being born in Kingston, Jamaica gives him extra points here. Eire mon!    ERA 3.16 - 6-5    K/IN/BB    68/88/40

R.P. 3  J.P  Howell Rays/Bourne’02-Wareham ‘03 Aided a patch-work yet very effective bullpen for the feel good story of the year “you can call me…Rays”.  Well besides “Nights in Rodanthe” of course…Fills the lefty role in this pen.     ERA 2.22    6-1      K/IN/BB   92/89/39

R.P. 4    J.J. Putz  Mariners/Y-D ‘97-Hyannis ‘98 The aforementioned Putz, watch your mouth, put together an O.K. season despite injuries and the fact that he pitched for the worst team in baseball, well the Nat’s don’t count.  ERA - 3.88             K/IN- 56/46                            SV 15

Closer  B. Wagner Metropolitans/Brewstah ‘92 Still throws flames despite Herve’ Villechaize like frame and his injury was directly related to Mets 2nd consecutive (chuckle) collapse.

ERA- 2.25              K/BB  45/9 BB                        SV- 23

  • Post Season Award….. MVP = Rocky Cherry Baltimore/ Brewster ‘00 - Wins because his name could’ve fit nicely on a Combat Zone marquee and That’s all that really matters.

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Palin Kills Republicans Chances In Red Sox Nation

October 16, 2008 · Filed Under MLB, Uncategorized · 5 Comments 

by the goat… Oh my god Sarah Palin scares the crap out of me. Besides the famous Matt Damon question of whether or not dinosaurs actually existed (click here for the video), there is now a new and even more frightening development… She is using voters sports loyalties to enhance her political rhetoric! (GASP!) This has gone to far. Here is an excerpt from the New York Times:

Ms. Palin visited Salem, N.H. Wednesday night and said she looked forward to watching Senator John McCain debate Senator Barack Obama “right here, in the heart of Red Sox Nation.” Ms. Palin said that “Red Sox fans know how to turn an underdog into a victor,” a timely applause line given that the Sox trail the Tampa Bay Rays three-games-to-one in the best-of-seven American League Championship Series.

It seems, however, that Ms. Palin voiced a similar sentiment - actually, identical sentiment - last week at a rally in Florida.”How about those Tampa Bay Rays?” Ms. Palin said after the Rays defeated the Chicago White Sox.

“You know what that tells me? It tells me that the people in this area know a little something about turning an underdog into a victor.”

This bitch must be stopped! We don’t like to get political here on BSP, but we would call anyone from any party out for this crap.

Seriously, shouldn’t a Vice Presidential candidate be disqualified just for thinking they can get away with this shit? Has Sarah Palin ever heard of recording devices? The Internet? Sports Blogs? Do they have any of these things in Ruktkeytucktuk Alaska or wherever she hails from?

I mean I can understand not believing in evolution, some people are not very bright.

I can get past her saying that if the “under god” part of the pledge of allegiance was good enough for the founding fathers then it is good enough for her (The pledge of allegiance was written in 1892). Some people don’t know U.S. history.

I can get past her wanting to turn Alaska into a 19th century Lowell and the Bering Sea into a 20th century Charles River. How else will she pay for the gas to drive her illegitimate grandchild and friends to the hockey rink in her Escalade? Oh and fuck Polar Bears, they don’t do shit for us anyway.

I can get past the fact that it took her six colleges to get a Bachelor’s degree, although that does make half my retarded friends qualified to be V.P.

What I can not get past is rallying Red Sox nation with the same battle cry earlier bestowed upon the 17 fans of the Tampa Bay Gays. This my friends is inexcusable, it almost makes me wish goats could vote.

Click here for a glimpse into the oval office if Palin becomes president. Make sure to have your volume up and and click on as much stuff as possible!

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Welcome To The Machine

September 26, 2008 · Filed Under MLB, RED SOX · 3 Comments 

-Today we have the much anticipated debut post of Tiny Danza. He brings it hard as expected, coming right out of the gates with a fuck you to the Yankees and the Pink Hats of Sox Nation. Nice work Tiny.

- by Tiny Danza… Earnest Hemingway once wrote in The Old Man and the Sea - “…Son never lose faith in the Yankees.” Well fuck Hemingway! He ended up in Cuba anyway didn’t he? And fuck The Yankees! Their season, dynasty and crummy little “house” have all crumbled before our very eyes. And while the love fest at B.S.P is going down I’m comin’ with a lovin’ spoonful for my main man Theo “Boy Genius” Epstein. While many of us were crying in our Yaz painter’s caps because Billy “Moneyball” Beane spurned the Sox and their lucrative offer in ‘02 to take over baseball operations. The Sox subsequently hired a young nobody and Luchino protege named Theo Epstein. Upon being hired Theo outlined 4 prominent organizational goals which are outlined and dissected in the proceeding paragraphs:

1. Re-build the moribund minor league system by making it a “…player development machine” -Check

The Yankee dynasty of yesteryear was not solely the by-product of the Steinbrenner Cabbage farm, but came to fruition in spite of it. Contrary to popular belief those Championship Yankee teams were built upon the backs of: Jeter, Rivera, Posada, Pettite, Williams, Soriano and Mendoza (yes there WAS a time he was very effective) all drafted and developed in their system to form a rock solid nucleus. Homegrown cheap talent filling spots at: S.S., CL, C, SP, C.F, 2nd, RP encompassing the most important positions in middle of the field.

Possessing upwards $200 million didn’t hurt either, well at least not at first. You see having that much Cabbage allows teams/G.M.’S to be more aggressive but also allows/exaggerates their mistakes e.g., Pavano, Irabu, Giambi, etc. etc.. And like the call of the siren, the allure of pricey free-agents and sexy trades at the expense of young/cheap talent will leave your franchise stranded on the rocks for YEARS. Just LOOK at the Yankees pitching staff for next year as proof. $200 mill and you’ve got: Rivera, Joba, and well…. SHITE! Hughes and Kennedy have been less productive than Irabu the infamous “Fat Toad” in the popular Yankee fable. Mussina and Pettite both faced Honus Wagner as rookies while Pavano will be retiring giving his body to medical research. A confluence of events that’s left the once proud Yankee farm system as potent as a Giuliani seamen sample and the roster just as useless. All the while BOY WONDER has stockpiled: Beckett (TRD), Dice (FA), Lester, Delcarmen and Papelbon in their collective prime, with Bucholz, Masterson, Bowden, and Bard on the horizon. Not to mention: Youk, Pedroia, Ellsbury, Lowrie in the everyday line-up with Lars Anderson, and Argenis “I’ll win 8 gold gloves” Diaz on their way. The indisputable fact remains that in 4 years the Sox farm system has gone from laughing stock to “player development machine”. Welcome to the machine my friends welcome.

2. Reach the Post-season every year - *5 out of 6

Technically *4 of 5 as Theo’s contract dispute kept him Read more

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The Thrill Is Gone

September 17, 2008 · Filed Under MLB, NFL, PATRIOTS, RED SOX · 1 Comment 

by the goat… Is it just me or has this pennant race been less exciting than a pre-season curling match between Rolling Dust Retirement Home and Trembling Hills Recovery Hospital? It is just impossible to get fired up about a Red Sox series/race with the Tampa Bay Gays.

There is no giddiness, no hatred, no feelings of urgency. Let the Rays win it, they aren’t going anywhere in the playoffs anyway. No matter when it happens the Sox/Angels series is going to be the true ALCS.

I am about to say the most ridiculous thing I have ever said in my life… I miss the Yankees. They’re kind of like the friend you had in high school that you’re not sure how you even became friends with. The one who annoys the shit out of you, but then you miss him when he’s gone.

Screw the Rays and their six fans.

On another note, the Patriots are back to playing boring ass football too. Defense and Special Teams, Yawn. Another championship on it’s way, hooray Boston. All this winning is seriously getting tiresome. Even Brady still just looked “normal” last Sunday. His shirt must have been ripped worse than thought because he is still wearing number 16 for some reason.

I am surprised we haven’t heard anything about Tom abandoning number 12, I would think the media would notice something like that. Oh well, he is the best quarterback in the world no matter what number he wears.

Somebody give the goat something to get excited about. Maybe the Bruins will pull a deep playoff contender out of their ass this season. Yeah, and maybe Fenway will sell dollar drafts throughout the playoffs.

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Who Are These Guys?

August 31, 2008 · Filed Under MLB, RED SOX · Comment 

by the goat… Ok the Sox are just mashing it right now, they’re making the White Sox look like The Royals. In their last 5 games they have outscored Chicago and the Spankees 37-10. It is just amazing how well they are hitting the ball right now, and they have been getting some nice pitching recently too. The most incredible part? They are doing it with this lineup…

  1. Ellsbury
  2. Lowrie
  3. Ortiz
  4. Pedroia
  5. Kotsay
  6. Bay
  7. Varitek
  8. Bailey
  9. Cora

Lil’ Dusty reportin’ for cleanup duty?! Michael Bowden was the starting pitcher? Seriously? If you showed me that lineup last year, I would say one of two things. Either the Red Sox are 20 games out, or Varitek and Ortiz are rehabbing in Pawtucket and that is the Paw Sox lineup.

But no, the Sox are only 4.5 games back in their division and hold a 3.5 game lead in the wild card. Now this next sentence might come as a shocker since I am usually a cynical bastard.

The Red Sox are showing the Yankees how a good organization works right now. Both teams have been ravaged by injury. The Red Sox have had 20 trips to the DL this season, and we’re not talking about role player type guys, we’re talking names like…

  • Ortiz
  • Schilling
  • Beckett
  • Drew
  • Lowell
  • Matsuzaka
  • Wakefield
  • Lugo

Many of the names on the list have been declared “disabled” more than once this season. (I’ve always wondered how actual disabled people feel about baseball’s insistence that “right shoulder tightness” makes someone “disabled”) .

Well Skanks, watch and learn. Instead of trading away every prospect you have for every high priced superstar you can get your hands on, maybe it is time to take a look at the Red Sox model.

Four key guys in the starting lineup, two starting pitchers and three key bullpen guys are homegrown talent. Also, remember when I called Theo out for only trading Manny and doing nothing else before the trade deadline? Well who needs to make moves before the deadline when you can get two key guys after it? (Byrd, Kotsay)

Kudos Theo and the Red Sox management for proving me wrong and restoring my faith in your organization and it’s master plan.

Just so you know I still believe that this is all happening through osmosis. When you are within the same state as Bill Belichick consistently, you just automatically become a sports management genius. Just ask Danny Ainge.

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History Is Here

August 26, 2008 · Filed Under MLB, RED SOX · 1 Comment 

by the goat… Well it is upon us, the Red Sox are going into Yankee Stadium for what is definitely the last time in the regular season and most likely forever. I have to admit the gravity of it is actually starting to affect me. I didn’t give two shits about the nostalgia surrounding the All-Star game, but this seems different.

It is really strange to think that there will never be another wicked disappointment, another brawl or another magic run at Yankee Stadium for the Sox. I am feeling the history so much that I actually posted a photo of Yankee Stadium on BSP. It will never happen again, I assure you. Oh and if it makes you feel any better I am posting this from my brother in laws laptop, that way I didn’t have to download the picture onto mine. It would probably explode if I tried. Sorry Sean, I’ll delete it after.

This has all the makings of a great Sox Yanks series. A Sox sweep would virtually end the Yankees hopes at the post-season. How great would it be to slam the door shut on the Skanks’ season in the very stadium they are trying to extends longevity.

Buckle up, it’s going to be a great three days, and make sure to check in here. I am sure I will have lots to either rave or piss about.

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Man Love

August 1, 2008 · Filed Under MLB, RED SOX · 3 Comments 

by the goat… I am so sad today that I can’t write. We went from this:

manny ramirez

To this:

jason bay

What am I supposed to do with my man love now?

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Makin’ Moves (Calling Out The Wonder Boy)

July 30, 2008 · Filed Under MLB, RED SOX · 4 Comments 

theo epsteinby the goat… The Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim sent Casey Kotchman to Atlanta for Mark Teixeira yesterday. Quite the aggressive move when you consider that Kotchman was leading the Angels in both batting average and RBI. When you then throw in the fact that he is under contract until 2011 while Teixeira is a free agent next year, you realize that the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim of California of the United States of North America of the Western Hemisphere of Planet Earth are dead set on winning this year. Almost as much as they are dead set on expanding their fan base by incorporating as many geographical locations into their name as possible.

So The Skanks addressed two of their needs with Xavier Nady and lefty specialist (a.k.a. Papi specialist) Damaso Marte and now the Angels are making moves to upgrade already strong positions. Even Milwaukee is being aggressive before the deadline (Sabathia).

You have to start wondering at this point if the Red Sox are as hell bent on repeating as once thought. All this action and all they can talk about is moving their most productive bat of the last seven years? Look, since what took place last week I am done with defending Manny’s character (I still have man love for him though), but let’s be objective for a minute. Value? Impossible. Pat Burrell you say? He is in the midst of a career year sure, but his overall career numbers (.260 AVG… yikes) tell the story, and remember he did that on the senior circuit. Just leave Manny where he is, pick up his option (so he can’t go to the Skankees) and trade him in the off-season.

The Sox need a shortsop and some middle relief to win now. If they don’t address either of those needs, but trade Manny, then I will have no choice but to conclude that they are not 100% dedicated to this season. Call me a cynic, but between this lack of moves, the refusal to pinch hit for Varitek late in games and Tito’s unusually snippy attitude in press conferences I am just not feeling it right now.

Oh Yeah the Sox are 1-7 since the All Star Break against teams that aren’t the horrendously bad Seattle Mariners. So that doesn’t help either.

In conclusion, Theo, I am calling you out Wonder Boy! Let’s see some of that 2004 Orlando Cabrera, Dave Roberts magic! I know you have it in you.

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Manny Caught Jaywalking

July 22, 2008 · Filed Under MLB, RED SOX · 2 Comments 

manny high fives a fanFrom The Globe… Seems that Boston slugger Manny Ramirez was leaving the ballpark, with headphones on trying to look inconspicuous and quickly get away from the crowds still leaving the stadium. He started to cross South Royal Brougham Way, against the signals of a traffic cop who was directing pedestrians. The police officer demanded that Ramirez open his wallet and show identification. He warned him that he could face a $500 fine and possible arrest for disobeying a police officer.

It became clear to those watching that the policeman had no idea who Ramirez was. He didn’t ask for an autograph or anything, but did ask Ramirez if he’d attended the game. After the brief lecture, and no argument from Ramirez, the police officer let him go with no further trouble.

By the goat… Alright, what the hell is going on here, he asked Manny if he had attended the game? Someone should fine the cop working detail at a Mariners game for not knowing who the Dominican dude with the dreadlocks is. I am one incident away from posting a leave britney alone style video on youtube about Manny.

Too bad Manny doesn’t play for the Patriots. Nick Kaczur had the charges against him for illegally possessing 202 OxyContin pills dismissed today after paying $355. Let’s recap, Manny threatened with a $500 fine for walking across a street, Kaczur fined $355 for two hundred and two pills of OxyContin.

Don’t get me wrong I’m happy for Nick, but it just helps to put Mannys “crimes” into perspective sometimes. The only thing Manny is guilty of is being the coolest manchild on earth. The Red Sox and The Globe better not be in cahoots again to start a smear campaign against Manny (a-la Nomar). If they run him out of town, mark my words, I will buy a VW bus, grow my own white guy dreads and follow him wherever he goes. It’ll be Manny Tour and I’ll fund it by selling grilled cheese sandwiches in ballpark parking lots.

Sidenote: Jon Lester For President!

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All-Star Game Real Time Commentary

July 15, 2008 · Filed Under MLB, RED SOX · 2 Comments 

by the goat…

8:21 - O.K. is there anyone they haven’t introduced yet? The game hasn’t even started and I already want to punch Joe Buck in the face. He just introduced Reggie Jackson’s third cousin who once gave him a ride to a game when his car broke down.

8:26 - Yogi Berra just tried to sell insurance to Joe Mauer, “the kind that doesn’t make it hurt when you get hurt and miss work” great, another Yogi-ism that someone else wrote.

8:31 - Sheryl Crow? She’s from Kennett, Missouri! I’m no historian but I am pretty sure there is at least one singer from New York that knows the words to the National Anthem.

8:34 - Yogi Berra just tried to sell insurance to George Steinbrenner.

8:42 - Is there a baseball game tonight? Oh and is Yankee stadium historic in any way?

8:48 - Best thing Joe Buck has ever said: “Tim I want you to talk about Cliff Lee and I am going to just sit over here and be quiet“.

8:51 - The National League goes down one, two, three in the first, Bud Selig may as well schedule game 1 of the World Series in Boston now.

8:55 - Joe Buck: “Derek Jeter has done nothing but win since coming into the league.” Really Joe, he hasn’t lost one game?

8:58 - Joe Buck: “Here’s a guy (Josh Hamilton) who probably needed help brushing his teeth this morning.”

Tim McCarver: “Does that mean if you hit a lot of home runs you can’t brush your teeth?”

Chalk up a point for Timmy.

9:12 - Is it not ironic that a guy named Milton Bradley sucks at The Game Of Life?

9:23 - Did Joe Buck seriously just ask Yogi Berra about Sarah Jessica-Parker. How does this guy have a job? You can’t think of any other questions to ask a baseball legend at the All-Star Game?

10:53 - J.D. Drew homers! Tie ballgame, now we’re talking.

12:54 - Still going strong in the bottom of the 13th, a couple slices in the microwave, volume down to avoid cutting off my own ears after listening to Joe Buck for two hours longer than 9 out of 10 doctors recommend.

1:05 - If the A.L. wins this game J.D. Drew has to be the MVP, 2 RBI a run scored and a steal in a three run game is nothing to shake a stick at. The only person who has done more to help the American Leage Team is Dan Uggla.

1:09 - I hate to rag on George Sherrill since he has been a great surprise on my fantasy team but what on earth is with that brim? Doesn’t the act of just putting the hat on cause the visor to curl at least a little bit? It looks like he has half a dinner plate sewn into his hat.

1:15 - Who will be the first position player to pitch? I bet the N.L. is really wishing Rick Ankiel had made the roster right now.

1:35 - I am putting the over under at 2 a.m. for when Tito has a nervous breakdown. If it were me I’d just leave Kazmir in there all night, screw the Rays, you wanna sucker punch Coco, here’s your ace back half dead.

1:38 - Well that’s all she wrote, A.L. wins it 4-3 in 15. Looks like Terry will live another day. Signing off on our first and possibly last real time commentary, the goat.

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